DEAR MIDNIGHT SOCIETY,

Life advice, via Are You Afraid of the Dark (index) (random)

Dear Betty Ann,

Everybody’s laughing at me:

I think it’s because I’m chubby and like comics. What can I do?

Yours,

Jimmy Crack Korn

* * *

Dear Jim,

It looks like you’ve released the Ghastly Grinner.

His stupefies his victims, causing them to smile and drool blue goo. This gives them the appearance of “laughing” at you, but they are actually just dead inside. Kill the Ghastly Grinner, and the laughter will stop.

Another option is to hit the gym. It can be “cool” to be into comic books, but only if you’re in relatively good shape. It definitely wouldn’t hurt to give up the comics altogether, though. I know it’s your dream to one day make comics for a living, but a dream is nothing more than the doors it opens, and wouldn’t you rather open the door to popularity? I know I would.

All the best,

Betty Ann

  • 17 October 2012
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